As January approaches, I usually find myself thinking back on the past year’s accomplishments and highlights.
You might be wondering, why have I highlighted these seemingly sad, confusing, and scary moments of my year?
Because these are two moments that I thought would be the worst parts of my year and turned out to be some of the biggest blessings of my entire life.
First photo: January 28th, 2020. Me as a freshman at Syracuse University two weeks into the second semester. I am hysterically crying in my car knowing that I will not be successful if I stay at school & that I must come home. At that exact moment, I remember feeling so beyond lost. The thought of coming home with no plan truly freaked me out, but I also knew that I would be miserable if I stayed. In February, coming home from school turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made. I needed a break. I needed a breather. I opened up space for healthy habits, took care of my mental health, and started to figure out what was best for me going forward. I also got myself and all my belongings home safely one month before COVID-19 hit.
Second Photo: June 8th, 2020. Me on my 19th birthday, alone, in the ICU being treated for diabetic ketoacidosis (DKA). For years, I was in denial about having diabetes and did not properly take care of my blood sugars. Because of this, I unintentionally almost killed myself. This moment wasn’t exactly a blessing but it was a huge wake-up call that needed to happen. Since the day I was released from the hospital, my health (mental, physical, spiritual, & emotional) have been my TOP priority. I completely shifted my lifestyle into a healthy and enjoyable one. After a couple of months of having my blood sugars under control, I noticed so many positive shifts in my life that I never expected. Some examples: my mood completely stabilized, aches, and irritations that I used to have were gone entirely, etc.
Although moments like these can be beyond difficult, they also happen for a reason. There are hidden blessings in so many parts of our lives. 2020 has been a tough year for most. Sometimes we have to go through the hard shit to find the good. For me, that was definitely the case. The two darkest moments of my year ended up bringing me so much light. What doesn’t kill you for sure makes you stronger.